Harry's Loss
by PotterGeekLover
Summary: Harry misses Ginny but what happens when he begins to confront his past? Will everyone understand why he did what he did? Will his friends still be there for him? This started as a one shot but good reviews means more writing
1. Chapter 1

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters or terminology related to Mrs Rowling.

Harry stepped outside and the wind whipped the snowflakes into his face. He pulled his scarf up past his mouth as he wiped his glasses. He remembered fondly that Hermione could conjure up blue flames in a jar and they'd huddle around it for warmth in the winter outside. 'No, I mustn't remember them' he muttered to himself. So he set off at a brisk pace to try and make it to the corner shop before his nose froze over.

As he walked, the streetlights began to switch on and Harry looked up at the orange light – an almost similar shade to Ginny's hair. With this thought, a hand squeezed his heart and a tear reached the corner of his eye. Harry quickly brushed it away. It was so cruel for her to have been taken away from him by her own brother. Harry had constantly told Percy that the stress of being the minster for magic was too much and one day, he just lashed out at her. Harry hadn't even been there to hold Ginny as she took that one last breath.

With that, harry turned and sat on a bench, his legs shaking with grief unable to support him anymore. He sat and cried. A lonely cry. It had been three years since harry had even picked up a wand or seen anyone from the wizarding world. He just wanted to be alone in his grief.

Harry sat and sobbed quietly, his head bowed, hiding his tears from the world. He'd left the 'Other World' to live amongst the Muggles to avoid all of this grief. The grief that nobody else could feel. Harrys' own grief. His loss.

Harry remembered how Ginny used to cry like this. He used to hold her close and tell her how everything was going to be okay and she would look at him with her teary eyes and smile, putting all her faith in him. Then he'd tuck her hair behind her ear and gently press his lips to her forehead. These memories of his beautiful wife weren't as hard as they used to be.

Remembering her like this made him smile. Always trying to protect him... but look where that got her. It was time for him to face his fears and face the Weasley family once again. For the first time in over 15 years since he'd failed Ginny, Harry would step inside the Burrow.

With a new resolve, Harry wiped his tears, clenched his fists, stood up and strode for home.

Harry walked in his door and knocked Dobby over.

'Oh I'm sorry Dobby! I wasn't paying attention! I'm so sorry,' he muttered as he helped Dobby up.

'It's okay Mr Potter. Dobby has cooked you a nice stew. And Kreacher made master a lemon pie.' Dobby smiled up at Harry.

'I'm not hungry Dobby but thanks.' Dobby and Kreacher were one of the few things Harry had brought with him from the 'other world'. Partly because Dobby didn't want to leave Harry on his own because 'you'll need the company Sir' and partly because Kreacher was eternally grateful for the locket he'd been given by Harry many, many years ago.

'Is Master alright?' said Kreacher as he appeared next to Dobby with the familiar crack. 'We can make something else if Master would care for it?'

'How many times do I have to tell you two? It's just Harry. But really. Thanks for the concern but I'm fine… just… got a lot on my mind. I'll eat later if the food will keep?'

'Only if you're sure Har… Harr…. Mr Potter. Anything we can get you in the meantime Sir?' Kreacher still found it hard to call Harry by his first name just like Harry found it hard to give them direct orders.

'Actually… if it's no trouble, I would love a cup of tea. Could you possibly leave it on the table for me?'

As the elves retreated, Harry walked upstairs and plucked up the courage to enter the loft.

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Right guys! hope you've enoyed this!  
I know Dobby's supposed to be dead but I miss him so he's back! :)  
Ill try and update at least once every two weeks if I get some good reviews!  
Until next time!


	2. Chapter 2 - The Start of the End

Sorry Its taken a while to update but life just got in the way! It might be a while before I update again what with Christmas just around the corner! Sorry! I'm also going to apologise for any spelling or grammar mistakes :P My BETA bailed on so PM me if you wanna BETA this story :)  
But read and enjoy! Please Review - they're always welcome! :)

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**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or terminology associated with the books/films.**

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As the ladder descended from the loft hatch, Harry looked up and began to regret his decision. Maybe he shouldn't go to the Weasley's... but is it what Ginny would've wanted? The image of Ginny hardened his resolve and without any more hesitation, he climbed the ladder into the loft.

The dust swirled around the boxes as Harry stepped across the floor towards the back, right hand corner below the eaves. This was an area of the loft that had been left untouched for 15 years now. The box Harry was searching for was deep in the back - his school trunk. Harry thought that once the trunk was locked, it would never need to be opened again. Like Pandora's Box – opening it could only bring sadness and despair to Harry's life – more so than he already had.

The key turned slowly in the lock – resisting Harrys attempts to unearth the contents of the trunk. With one last jiggle, it turned and the lock popped open. Harry opened the trunks heavy lid with a groan from the hinges and he gazed at the contents. To anyone else, it might not appear to contain anything special but to Harry, his life was in that trunk. Tears began to well up in his eyes as he gazed upon the best years of his life.

There was alsorts in here. Everything from his school robes to potions books. The one object Harry was dying to see was the photo album. Hagrid had given it to him a present and he'd slowly filled the last few pages with pictures of him, Hermione and Ron. But it was the back page that pulled him. Every inch was filled with pictures of him and Ginny from Hogwarts through to their wedding and all the way through the seven short yeas they'd filled together. Many people said that seven was the most magical number, but for Harry, it just wasn't enough. As Harry gazed upon his favourite photos, a tear dripped from the corner of his eye and splashed onto the page.

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Sorry it's so short :( but this seemed the best place to break the chapter because other wise it would've been super long!  
Hope you've enjoyed it!  
R&R :) each review will get a reply though!


	3. Chapter 3 - Goodbye Muggle World!

Hey Hoped you enjoyed reading this as much as I am writing it!  
Still looking for that BETA if anyone's interested :)  
Any ways... HAPPY READING!

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_'As Harry gazed upon his favourite photos, a tear dripped from the corner of his eye and splashed onto the page.'_

Harry stared at the page for several long minutes, taking in every familiar curve of Ginny's face. Every strand of hair. Every smile. Every dimple. Harry new all of this both from the amount of times he'd watched her at Hogwarts and the amount of times he'd sat looking at her when they were together. That feeling of awe he felt with her never left him. Even though Ginny had gone from the world, she would always have a special plac in his heart. Forever.

Harry put the album down and once again peered into his trunk. There was one particular box that he would need if he was to go to the Weasley's in this blue moon. It was a long thin box. 'I know its in here' Harry muttered to himself. 'Where else could it be?' Getting desperate, he began to rifle through everything.

Harry pushed aside his old text books to see the corner of a dusty box. The box itself was battered and dusty but it held the most precious thing any wizard owned. Harry carefully took the lid off of the box and removed the tissue paper. Inside was his wand. As Harry picked it up, red and gold sparks shot from the end, showing the wand's joy at beign reunited with its owner. The corner of Harry's eyes twitched into what could almost be classed as a smile.

It was then that Harry decided that everything should leave the loft. 'Dobby? Kreacher?' They appeared and with a low bow they looked at Harry. 'I was wondering if you could possibly help me bring this trunk downstairs? And do I have any robes any where?'

Dobby looked at Harry and said, 'yes Sir but you'll need them washing. And we'll sort the trunk out. Please would you have something to eat? Only you looked perished!' With that, Harry's stomach rumbled and he laughed. 'Thanks guys.'

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As Harry stared at the scratched top of his kitchen table, he suddenly had a thought. 'Dobby...'

'Yes Mr Potter?'

'Would it be possibly for everything to be sorted out for about ten? Only I have somewhere to be.' Harry had complete faith that everthing would be sorted but it was only polite to ask.

'Of Course Mr Potter! Would you like some food packing? I take it that it's a long trip due to the trunk?' Dobby looked thrilled that Harry was going. It meant that he'd actually got an aim in life.

'Yes please Dobby! That'd be brilliant! I'll be gone for some time I fear. I'll send an owl to let you know how long I plan to be away but could you please look after the house? You're free to do as you please whilst I'm away! I can't thank you enough for coming with me Dobby. You and Kreacher have been absolute stars managing to look after me like this!'

Dobby looked ever so slightly embarrassed at all of the praise he'd just recieved. He'd never been treated so well outside of Hogwarts. 'Of course Sir. Anything for you Mr Potter!'

And with that, Dobby left to help Kreacher prepare for the following morning.

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The sunlight broke through Harry's curtains the following morning to fall across his face. He blinked the sleep from his eyes and he ruffled his hair. Today was the day. He slowly climbed out of his bed and into the shower. Once he was done, he dressed quickly and went for breakfast.

'Everything is finished now Mr Potter. Ready when you are!' Kreacher said whilst dishing up some porridge. 'You could leave early if you wished.'

Harry glanced at his watch. It was only eight o'cock but an early start wouldn't hurt. Once his breakfast was finished, he wandered around the house making sure that he'd got everything. On went his coat and scarf and he picked up his trunk. This morning reminded him of the many times he'd left the Burrow for Hogwarts. The last minute scarmble to make sure everything was packed. The mollycoddling (but this time by Dobby and Kreacher). An of course the feeling of nerves that accompanied every journey.

Finally Harry managed to leave the house after several reassurances by the house elves that everything was going to be okay whilst he was away. Harry ragged his trunk to the end of the road. Every house here was empty so his next actions couldn't be seen. He stuck his arm out in a confident fashion to be greeted by... nothing. 'Maybe I need my wand' thought Harry. So again he stuck out his wand and with aloud bang, a massive purple bus came careening round the corner towards him. 'I hate this stupid bus,' Harry muttered to himself. And with that, he climbed aboard.

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I apologise for the shortness of this chapter. I thought I'd post you one last little bit before I went away. So everyone have a happy holiday and I'll see you some time before the new year!

Cx


	4. Chapter 4 - Home Sweet Home?

So so so sorry aout the late update guys! I've had such a busy new year what with several family members ending up in hospital and uni interviews! I'll try and update much more often now! :)  
SAme disclaimer... I don't own any characters blah blah blah :)  
Enjoy!

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_'So again he stuck out his wand and with aloud bang, a massive purple bus came careening round the corner towards him. 'I hate this stupid bus,' Harry muttered to himself. And with that, he climbed aboard.'_

With a further loud bang, the bus race away from his muggle home. Harry sat on a seat and stared out of the window, remembering the last time he'd been on this bus. He remembered Ginny climbing aboard the bus and her laughter ringing out as the bus swerved and she bounced from seat to seat in giddyness. Harry had laughed along with her. He hadn't seen her that happy since they'd lost their first child a year previously. He loved the way the light sparkled in her eyes with genuine joy.

'Mr Potter'. A voice spoke Harry's name, snapping him out of his dream world. 'It's been a long time. How've you been keeping? You've dropped out of the newspapers I see. Been keeping yourself out of trouble? We all miss you.' Stan stood next to Harry slowly trailing of as he saw terars gleaming in his eyes. Stan lowered his own eyes to the floor to prevent the war hero from seeing the red rise up his neck. 'I'm sorry Mr Potter. Where are you heading to?'

Harry looked at the poor stammering man. 'It's okay Stan. I've just been keeping my head down. Staying out of trouble. You know me. Can I have the Burrow please? Two galleons should cover it right?

'It most certainly will Mr Potter. Also a hot chocolate if you want? And a toothbrush?'

'Hold the toothbrush cheers Stan. Keep and change. Consider it a gift from one man to another.' Harry turned his face back to the window and watched the scenery flick by picking up his memories from earlier.

_Ginny smiled at Harry as he twirled her around the dance floor on their wedding day.  
Harry kissing Ginny's nose and making her giggle.  
Ginny's hand fitting perfectly into his.  
The massive card she'd sent him to congratulate him on his new job.  
The fights they had over little things._

Each of these memories ran through his head. Each priceless memory of Ginny that only Harry could hold. The feelings that only Harry could feel for the most important person in his life.

'Your stop Mr Potter. Thank you for travelling on the Knight Bus. We hope to see you soon.' Stan smiled at Harry and motioned to the doors.

With that, Harry stepped off the bus and pulled his cloak tight around him in order to try and keep the fear inside of him.

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It never changed here. The house was still crooked. Chickens still strolled through the yard and there was still a pile of boots near the door. As Harry gazed upon the house, a great feeling of love and guilt fell upon his shoulders. The woman he often thought of as his mother lived here and he so desperatly wanted one of her loving hugs but he felt do guilty for leaving them like he did. Storming out without a word.

Harry tentatively stepped towards the boundary wall of the Burrow. Night was coming but Harry was confident that Molly would still be up. Harry walked to the door and laid his hand on the latch. Do many memories were behind this door - both painful and happy. Harry didn't know how he would be recieved. it could go either way and with his resolve, he took a deep breath and with one last look around him, swung the door open.

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OOOOOH What lies behind the door for him?  
PM me with any ideas you have! Hope you enjoy it! Please R+R  
Cx


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